Rule # 11 Work hard when the waves are bad / Note to Secretery Giethner

Rule #11 work hard when the waves are bad.

When I moved to Encinitas I was told you don't want to be Sick, Sued, Arrested or Audited when the waves are good. Your Doctor, Lawyer, cop friend and Accountant are out surfing. OK fair enough, but you know when the waves are crap these guys are the best. We know this and the system works well.

Now my note to Secretary Geithner:

The waves have not been good. Overall the winter swell session has been no excuse to blow off work. You need to step it up a bit. We have a nice big South Swell on the way but most of us are up on our work. Making the calls communicating with our customers. (We might as well overachieve now and be able to surf when the waves come).

Tim you are a surfer and should know the rules. which brings us to-

Rule#11-You have to work when the waves a bad. Not just work but work spectacularly well enough to be able to surf when the waves are good and your customers/bosses/minions will think you are on some big project. (Read your boss Obama is up and working, he will be able to rule Sandy Beach on his next vacation)


My guy Robert Reich is turning on you. He wants you to take action, let AIG start imploding ,take over the insolvent banks and spend your time protecting our assets and policies. Un and underemployment is on the rise, China is nervous, Mars needs women, pay your taxes. All this going on and we have a South Swell ready to hit any moment. Get your house in order or no one will give you a wave the next time you go to Martha's Vineyard with your board. Remember in surfing we run the ultimate democracy. A kook is still a kook whether you are the highest powered financial guy in the world or your my 11 year old son Logan. You get respect if you give it.
So Tim it's time to work spectacularly. We are pretty cool here about our shapers and glassers a bit late when the surf comes up, but we know that they will take care of business and get us our boards when the waves are flat. Talk with a clear voice on what is going on. Be calm, your smarter than us and we need you right now.
Do something....You have put Jon Stewart in charge of fiscal regulation...funny and uncomfortable but we need you.

The Daily Show With Jon StewartM - Th 11p / 10c

Jim Cramer Unedited Interview Pt. 2

Daily Show Full Episodes
Important Things w/ Demetri Martin

Political Humor
Jim Cramer

No waves for you until you get on the program.

Rule #34 Shark Week and other Forbiden Media

Being a surfer and meeting several people as sales rep, there are a few conversations that generally will come up.

Non Surfing Customer....'Do you wear a wetsuit, is it cold?'

Me....'Yes we wear wetsuits almost year round.' (I don't tell them that I am obsessed with wetsuits and spent several hours, days and weeks thinking, buying and blogging about them.)

Non Surfing Customer....'Do you see any sharks?'

Me.....'No I don't'

Here is where it is tricky. Most people are obsessed with sharks and shark week, jaws, etc. I have seen sharks, twice. I don't admit it often or even to myself because of the paranoia involved.

The first time I saw a shark I was in Mexico in the late 70's at a beach break with a friend out. and there it was. We were the only guys out and we sprinted to shore. I saw the fin and spent years trying to convince myself it was a dolphin.

The second time I had an encounter was at Scott's Creek up north of Santa Cruz. Scott's Creek was the big wave spot before Mavericks was known to anyone but Jeff Clark. I was surfing a head high day and a great white probably about 10 foot came through the line up. It was crowded and the guys started yelling "Shark!, Shark!" I sprinted in. Again I saw the fin and tried to convince myself it was a dolphin but it was a shark and a great white at that.

When Jaws came out everyone of my friends went to see it. However, I didn't.

This is all I am committed to see on Jaws. After the movie several of my Friends did not surf for a few weeks. They were so freaked out. I being paranoid about most things knew this going in and was happy to stay at home watching TV that night and surf for the next several weeks.

So yesterday I am in Long Beach talking to a chemist who is completely nuts about sharks. He was telling me how they are going further into to the science of their killing instincts.

Me, I propose the rule....Stay away from Shark Week you will thank me when you are surfing alone some day and you are not focused anything but the waves.

Rule #19 Never Bail Your Board, Never Ever Ever Bail Your Board

Ok...Yes I have bailed my board...

many times.

Not in the GOP Congress way (finding Jesus and not wanted to approve Obama's stimulus after they spent a fortune on the war), but when it is big enough you just let go.

But I contradict myself. Let me revisit the Etiquette page telling me not to let go of my board.

go ahead and click to read
But I am sticking with the rule. Realistically I am out surfing 3 foot Leucadia most of the time. The last swell we had it was reaching head high and as I was paddling out this wave breaks in front of the guy in who was right in front of me. He doesn't look back or assess the wave he just lets go. I didn't say anything. I swallowed my anger and just paddled away warning others of the impending danger if you end up behind him.

There are situations where there is no hope.

However I want to hold on to something that floats when it gets bigger. Like having Krugerrands while the Dow goes over the falls at Teahupoo.

My Juinor High School friend Derrick Dorner said in his interview about whether to bail or hold your board at big Sunset..."Hold on even when the west peak sneaks in. The part of your board that survives the impact might be what keeps you alive"

As the economy goes further down think hard about this rule.

Rule #21 paddling out; when caught inside don't try to out paddle the surfer on the wave.

Today I think I got a speeding ticket from one of those Big Brother Camera Light thingies on the corner of Leucadia and El Camino. It reminds me of the paddle out etiquette.

I learned this rule as a fledgling grom in Santa Cruz. This was back when the learning process for groms was more hands on and Draconian.

So here I was surfing Pleasure Point in 1974. While paddling out I was trying to out run Rumples Uncle.....quick story

Me at Pleasure's Circa 74

There were two guys with long white beards that surfed Pleasure Point at the time. We did not know their names so we quickly named them Rumpelstiltskin and Rumples Uncle. Rumpelstiltskin was said to have been recently released from the Carrillo the state mental hospital. We didn't doubt the rumor because he spent most of his sessions talking to himself and singing. He rode a kneeboard which was still popular in the 70's for reasons I still don't understand, but although he looked crazy, he seemed happy with himself and friendly.

Rumple's Uncle was a different animal all together. He rode an early fish and was a decent surfer. He was serious and meaner than Rumpelstiltskin. Rumple's Uncle had no time for groms.... anyway back to the story.

Above: Rumple's Uncle Artist Depiction

So I am paddling out on a head high day. This was when I first started venturing into larger surf. I was trying to outrun Rumple's Uncle on a head high right peeler. I was in panic mode trying not to get hit by the wave. Although I seemingly made it through the wave before it broke, Rumple's Uncle hit me at full speed.

Me- (we are tangled up) "Sorry Man"

Rumple's Uncle- "You Maggot! ". He was face to face with me and looked scary with his eyes bright red and his long white beard like a character from The Lord of the Rings. Right about the now I wanted to be home watching cartoons and eating cookies. It was at this moment he did something that would change my approach to paddling out forever. He took his right hand and Wack! He back handed me.

Me-(surprised and voice cracking) -"Hey man ..uncool (idiom of the time)?" I wasn't sure what to say or do as I was still in a tangle with this bad German fairy tale creature.

Rumple's Uncle-(Starting to gain composure) "look kid, next time if you can't make it around the guy on the wave, you have to wait even if it means getting worked by the whitewater"

Fair enough. He didn't punch me or throw me out of the water. He was telling me that I was not the most important person in the universe, slow down, be safe, follow the rules.

Rumple's Uncle turned out to be Steve Coletta of Natural Curves surfboards. Steve no longer has a long beard and sometime around 1978 no one backhanded a kid without child protective services and 4 lawsuits. Steve is a friendly nice guy who needed to give a kid some advice. I am indebted to him for it. He still makes boards for my friend Rob Yuen.

Today if I had remembered Steve's advice, I would not be online looking for traffic school tonight.

Sometimes you have to be patient.

Rule #17 Never Give Up Good Waves For The Hope Of Better Ones to Come

As we move into day 12 of bad waves I remember this day in October when David Gray shot this picture. It was a Friday and I had all day to surf, but came in early thinking Saturday would be a good surf day. It wasn't. Looking at the rain outside and the lack of waves I will remeber this rule of surfing when we get good surf again.